Big Ticket

Annie: I don’t care.

Dave: I will kill you. I’m not kidding.

Annie: So you keep saying, Dave, but I...don’t...care. The only thing I do care about is making you suffer. Not just for me, but for all the other thousands of people you leech off. I’m going to make you an example. So all the other bottom-feeders in your business get to see what happens when good people get pushed too far.

Dave: Look. Annie. You’re upset. I can see that. Maybe I made a mistake. But I do think you’re overreacting a bit. I was just doing my job. It’s against the law to park in prohibited areas. You’re not being reasonable.

She comes closer.

Annie: How about I park something in one of your prohibited areas?

Dave: What makes you so sure you’ve got the right guy?

Annie: I saw you with my own eyes. Plus.?.?.

She yanks a notebook from her purse.

Annie (reading): “David Mason Markus.” Is that not you? “Proprietor, Dave’s Towing and Auto Pound.” Is that not you? “acsm 833.” Is that not the licence number on your truck? “Cindy.” Is that not the name you’ve got painted right underneath your hood ornament? “Moose.” Is that not what your friends and former fellow inmates call you? “Six feet, two inches. Two hundred and ten pounds, brown hair, brown eyes. Birthmark, left elbow. Fire-breathing dragon tattoo, right bicep.” Is that not you? “Three months less a day in the Brampton Correctional Facility for assaulting your high school teacher.” Do you not recognize that person...Moose?

He slumps down, head in hands.

Dave: Okay, it was me. I apologize. Now why don’t you just forget about all that shit and get back in here so I can take you some places you’ve never been before.

Annie: What kind of places? What do you mean by that? What kind of places have I never been before?

Dave: I think you know.

Annie: No, I don’t know. What kind of places would you take me to where I’ve never been before–exactly? Are we talking tongue here?

Dave: I’m thinking about forgetting about all this bullshit and you and me just get it on. You’ll like it. It’s what you want, isn’t it? That’s what this is really all about?

Annie: I honestly can’t believe what kind of pathetic weasel you are.

Dave: You’re getting off on this.

Annie: In what way are you defective? How is it that you can’t even begin to understand the nature of the evil you inflict on the world? You’re an ape. You’re less than an ape. I don’t want to live in a world with people like you in it.

Dave: Okay, okay, I get it. You’re not that kind of chick.

Annie: None of us is that kind of chick, Dave.

Dave: You think I’m a bad person.

Annie: Of course I do! You descend on people at random. Like Robin Hood in reverse. You take from the innocent and give to the government. Do you have any idea how much harm the government can do with that much money?

Pause.

Dave: You’re not being very fair. You don’t know me. I breathe. I eat. I sleep. Just like you. I have a kid. I have a dog. I like to watch TV. I go for walks in the woods. Where in fuck do you get off calling me stupid, criticizing my life? You don’t even know who I am.