Absolutely terrific. Should be required reading for all teachers, all school boards and physicians — all the people who should be able to identify and help kids like Andrew and who miss him and in their misdiagnosis, hurt him as much as his birth mother did. Theer are many many more Andrews in the big cities with moms who will never admit as much because they could not live with the stigma themselves.
Over the years since he was born my 15 y/o son has accumulated several labels: ADHD, Non-verbal Learning Disorder, and Anxiety & Depression. Because he was adopted and he has a higher than normal IQ, we do not have proof that he has fetal alcohol damage, but none of the labels above quite describes his thinking and behavior as well as Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder.
Until I did my own digging on the internet, no mental health or educational expert had ever suggested this. Alex's behavior took a extreme downturn at puberty and Lynn Cunningham's article is searingly familiar to me. Like Andrew, my son loves the guitar. I can only hope that he keeps this love and that someday it provides a bridge to a self-sustaining life.
I too, will be in my 70's when my son reaches his late 20s and I expect that he will still be at home with us. This fall he finished a theraputic school that was wonderful in helping him identify and explore his feelings and he became more adept in reporting them to us. It was a huge step forward. Now he is in a nearby (more academic) private school and we are keeping our fingers crossed that it will be a good fit. The money that we have had to pay out of pocket is staggering, and it is a shame that there are so few public schools that can provide what these kids need. Our state here in the US has very few parental and educational supports and an over-abundance of juveniles in prison. I am convinced that a huge number of them suffer from FAS. It is a gross human tragedy.
I want to thank Ms. Cunningham for her article, and I too, hope that it will help other parents and professionals identify children who are suffering from this disorder. We must keep up the crusade against alcohol use in pregancy.
